~My Sweet Life~

What Put a Smile on My Face Today...

~Mexican food and a margarita on the rocks (I hate frozen)

~the pedicure I got

~being able to see my baby boy crawl, stand up by himself, AND say "uh-oh" for the first time all within the same 5 minutes!

~my husband giving me a "pep talk" and knowing exactly what I needed to hear when I was on the verge of breaking down from the stress of Mac's multiple vomiting and diarrhea episodes today

~new scrapbook supplies! :)

~knowing that ONE WEEK FROM TODAY I am leaving with my 2 girlfriends for a day and a half getaway which will include (but not be limited to) pampering, shopping, eating, and the best part...staying up late talking

#3 Favorite Song Right Now

I am really struggling right now...with exhaustion and sleep deprivation and lack of patience and primarily, fear. I want so much to know what is going on with my baby to cause him to be sick and fussy and frankly, not lots of fun to be around right now--especially at night. I think I slept from 3:30 this morning till 6:30. It feels like things will never get better. At times it feels like I have run out of faith. That's part of why this song is my #3 favorite right now....

"Never Alone" (Barlow Girl)

I waited for you today
But you didn't show
No no no
I needed You today
So where did You go?
You told me to call
Said You'd be there
And though I haven't seen You
Are You still there?

I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I"m never alone

And though I cannot see You
And I can't explain why
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life

We cannot separate
'Cause You're part of me
And though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen

A Few Moments of Calm

Things I love~

~the sound of Taylor doing something silly to make his baby brother laugh really hard

~overhearing Sarah tell Taylor about something I had said to her that made her happy

~watching Mac "dance" when he hears music...any music

~enjoying just a few moments of not being worried about Mac

So Scared

In June of 2003 I gave birth to a very tiny baby boy. His skin was red and his fingernails were perfectly formed. He had a slight smile on his sweet, angelic face. I held him in my arms for only moments. I went shopping for a soft, blue blanket to wrap him in. And then picked out a tiny casket and buried him. At that time I could not fathom facing anything more difficult.

Today I have a beautiful 10 month old baby boy. He has strawberry blond hair and 4 bruises in a row across his forehead from learning to crawl. He loves to bite my chin. The only thing he knows how to say is "GaGa".  He knows how to wave. He holds both arms straight up in the air when he takes his first and last bottles of the day. He greets his older brother with the biggest, sweetest, toothy smile he can muster. He wakes his sister up every morning by jumping on her legs while she is still in bed. The only way he can fall asleep at night is by resting on his daddy's chest. He drives me crazy and at the same time he fills me with such joy I can actually feel my heart warm. The mere thought of ever having to bury another baby is excruciating. All day long that thought has crept in and out of my mind. My baby boy has been sick since February. His pediatrician cannot understand why. His blood count is elevated, but they cannot find anything to explain it. We are being sent to an "infectious disease specialist" and I am terrified. Last night I made my baby cry himself to sleep (for over an hour)because my husband and I were exhausted and tired of holding him all night. I think tonight I will hold him while he sleeps--even if it takes all night long--and I will thank God for every single moment.

My #2 Favorite Christian Music Song

Don't really know why, but I wanted to post the lyrics to this song--my second favorite piece of contemporary Christian music. You can click here to actually listen to it (scroll down to the bottom of the page it takes you to). I swear it brings tears to my eyes when I hear the words sung. Boy, does it hit home with me. I think it's beautiful.

Shaun Groves - Welcome Home
From the album Invitation To Eavesdrop

Take me, make me all You want me to be
That's all I'm asking, all I'm asking

Welcome to this heart of mine
I've buried under prideful vines
Grown to hide the mess I've made
Inside of me, come decorate, Lord

Open up the creaking door
And walk upon the dusty floor
Scrape away the guilty stains
Until so sin or shame remain

Spread Your love upon the walls
And occupy the empty halls
Until the man I am has faded
No more doors are barricaded

chorus:
Come inside this heart of mine it's
Not my own make it home
Come and take this heart and make it
All Your own Welcome Home
Take a seat, pull up a chair
Forgive me for the disrepair
And the souvenirs from
Floor to ceiling
Gathered on my search for meaning

Every closet's filled with clutter
Messes yet to be discovered
I'm overwhelmed, I understand
I can't make this place all
That You can

(chorus)

I took the space that
You placed in me
Redecorated in shades of greed
And I made sure every
Door stayed locked
Every window blocked, and
Still You Knocked

Take me, make me all You want me to be
That's all I'm asking, all I'm asking

My 7 Yr Old Set Me Straight

My daughter rides the bus to school each day. There are 6 other kids that meet at her bus stop. They are so funny...it is really important to them to be first in line. As a matter of fact, when one of them gets there, they say "I'm FIRST" or "I'm SECOND"...you get the idea. The worst thing is to be the person who is LAST! Since my daughter IS my daughter, there are plenty of mornings she is LAST! She told me just over this past weekend that it really bothers her when one of the boys always says to her "Sarah, you're LAST!" So this morning I decided we would leave 10 minutes earlier than usual. She was very excited about the prospect of not being the last one to get there. I told her as we were driving to the bus stop, "Just think, you can say to Richmond "YOU'RE LAST!!!!!"

She looked at me and said "No, then that would make me like him".             

I Don't Usually Cook!

I am very fortunate to have a husband that LOVES to cook! I don't mind cooking. I know how. Just give me a recipe and I can pretty much follow it. But my husband can cook without a recipe--just throwing stuff together and it is almost always wonderful! I think that's really cool.

Anyway, I came across this recipe on AOL and made it a couple of nights ago. If you are like me--looking for fast, easy, and especially not TOO many ingredients, this is for you! It was a hit at our house! YAY ME! We did add ground beef, though, per Stephen's request! Try it!

Last-Minute Lasagna

From Real Simple

1  26-ounce jar pasta sauce
1  30-ounce bag frozen large cheese ravioli, unthawed
1  10-ounce box frozen chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
1  8-ounce bag shredded mozzarella
1/2  cup grated Parmesan

Heat oven to 350° F. Coat a 13-by-9-inch baking dish with cooking spray and spoon in a third of the sauce. Arrange 12 ravioli on top and scatter the spinach over them. Top with half of each cheese. Cover with another layer of ravioli and the remaining sauce and cheese. Cover with foil and bake 25 minutes. Uncover and bake 5 to 10 minutes more or until bubbly.

Yield: Makes 6 servings

Belated Birthday Card for Abby

Abby~this is a picture of the birthday card I have been working on for you. I will put the final touch on the inside of it tonight and get it in the mail to you tomorrow, ok? Love you sweet girl!

Aunt Amy

AWWWWWW

Today was my oldest son's 15th birthday. As mentioned in a previous post, he has a girlfriend. Well, I was looking over the birthday cards he received and came across the one from his girlfriend. I couldn't tell you what the card itself said, but she had written in it: "I love you so much!" I thought that was the sweetest thing. When I told him I had seen that, I thought at first he might get mad at me, but instead, he looked at me with such a sweet expression and said "I don't think I've ever liked a girl as much as I like Karah."

Birthday Boy(s)

HAPPY

BIRTHDAY

TAYLOR!!!!

(and to your cousin BAILEY!)